Critical

I might stop putting titles in my posts. I always know how to end my posts, but dont know how to start it.

Anyway, my routine this week is:

8am- wake up/watch FoxNews/shower

930am- gym

1130m- shower/blogs/a bit of house cleaning/watch ABSCBN

130pm - off to work

10pm- finishes work

1030pm- pretending to be discussing world issues with A :and this week our topics had included-

1. US' presidential elections,


2. if I looked good with my Banana Rep shirt last Tuesday,


3. oil prices,


4. if I looked good with my TopMAn jacket last Wednesday,


5. President Mugabe


6. and if I looked good with my FCUK jacket last Thursday

While in the Nursing home last Wednesday, in passing I watched Home and Away and happened to see this man's hairstyle and I told one staff that I want that hairstyle. That staff said "kris, that is your hairstyle!". That hairstyle is that messy, spiked up like- just electrocuted way. That actually worried me. That means I forgot what myself look like?

I have 10 minutes to finish this post. Im not working tomorrow, still thinking how I'll spend that day. Now if it's within week after payday I'll surely know how to spend it. But 2 weeks BEFORE payday, I actually am clueless.

It's 820am, I have no intentions of making any literature today, but when I woke up, I thought of not following my routine today. coz I'm a normal human being... and not following routines is normal... It's like committing a crime, it's like overspeeding in a motorway, it's like washing your coloured shirts with plain white shirts together. Being a rebel is sexy. So I thought of checking ABSCBN.com.

And one featured news was about the death of one respected Director. But that wont be my topic for today.. BUT THIS:

"________ feels that Direk _______ is making his presence felt and said, “Noong 3 to 4 in the morning ata yun, may narinig akong butiki. Feeling ko si Manong yun kasi alam niya na takot ako sa butiki. (English: at around 3-4am, I've heard a lizard's sound. I think it was Manong coz he knows I'm afraid of lizards)” - from a former childstar

That statement is fucking ace!

Some of us still believe these things... Which is good, I actually dont care..

But I have no idea that as a spirit we can tranform into an animal that our loved ones HATE most. But why something we hate most? I just remembered that when my mum died, I saw a mosquito in my room when I was in Chicago. And I hate mosquitos... And you know what we usually do if we see a mosquito... I think I squashed it.

I feel bad now.

So from now on, I will love all animals, including these:

• I wont kill anymore ants (coz they might be my dead grandparents trying to communicate with me)


• I wont poison anymore rats (coz that might be my dead uncles trying to communicate with me)


• I wont step/squash any more cockroaches (coz that might be my dead aunts trying to tell me something)

That actually has just complicated my life.

ps.

I want to have a factual study of my readers insights, so please I would be very grateful if you could take part with that poll I have started. Treat it as your early bday gift for me (5months from now actually). Also dont forget to drop a line in krisjasper@krisjasper.com after voting/reading this post. I love hearing from my readers.

PERFECT CRIME

I apologize if I havent really visited your sites recently... Except for Monday (just gone), I have been at the Nursing Home everyday.. and after an hour, Im off again to go there for a late shift today. Or probably not, but I might regret it.


Before I bore you with my tic tacs, here's my AOL's Tarot Cards Reading last Monday:


LOVE- the Chariot; TOUCHSTONE- the Devil; CAREER- the Hermit.


AOL goodheartedly explained those three. I rarely check my fortune coz I dont really believe in such; I still think that whatever it is that tomorrow brings, is a consequence of what we have done yesterday and today. I got worried when I saw my reading for the Touchstone though. First I didn't know what a Touchstone is, and second because of that Devil card. Anyway, what's a touchstone?


And my career... A fucking hermit???!!! I had my supervision yesterday and I was appraised (in a way) to be a brilliant worker (ahem!). I dont think my work performance has been withdrawn nor a recluse. I think AOL failed me bigtime. BIGTIME.


Although on that day (some time between 3 til 4pm), I had an oral-accidental interaction with the bleach (but nah, I havent swallowed it). I was in a way being careless, and WEAK. Oh well, one good thing after that incident, the bleach had whitened my teeth.

Maybe that was the devil my freaking card was talking about? Hmmm.....


Last Monday night, we watched the Forbidden Kingdom and I should say it is a great movie.
5/5 stars from krisjasper.com. I was hesitant to watch it at first, but man... we did enjoy it.


The movie ended at 910pm. When we got out of the Screen 2, The movie Mama Mia was to be shown at 915pm just in the next theatre (Screen 1). So we entered it, OBVIOUSLY WITHOUT A TICKET. but we got paranoid, My heart was pounding all throughout... everytime we saw people walked in we always assumed they were inspectors. So after 10 minutes we went out. You all know I'd like to be featured in the telly, but not in that kind of news.


Today's Wednesday, I have been ridiculously eating a lot recently (thanks to Grace and Julius, for all the foods you have sent me). I went to the gym early today to burn some calories, and after an hour when I felt light again, I stopped at Subways to have my brunch. I had steak and melted cheese with jalapenos, onions, tomatoes sandwiched in a soft hearty Italian bread, topped with lite mayo. The more I burn, the more I eat... I guess I am just fooling myself.


To really lose weight, I might start eating papers again soon.


I might start with my TOEFL reviewer.


I might start with those Care Plans I'm currently finishing.


I might start with our patient's files.


I might start with these staff rotas I'm doing.


I didn't know I have a lot of options...

In A Bit...

Clov_rfield...

a story of 5 young New Yorkers... blah de blah..

blah de blah...

blah de blah...

blah de blah.

see here.

Reviews:

A dazzling experiment that paid off immensely, this is cinematic pleasure at its purest. One caveat: If they ever make a sequel, we’re taking two stars back. (5 stars) - EMPIREonline.com

“Clov_rfield” delivered some legitimate thrills and downright creepy moments. (3 stars)- Bullz-eye.com

Now that the fanboy hype has cleared, we can see Clov_rfield for what it is: borrowed inspiration, trite screenwriting and amateur acting all in the service of a ballsy idea — that a horror movie could maybe, just maybe, have a soul. As it turns out, Clov_rfield's virtues are all mechanical, but, hot damn, what it might have been. (2 1.2 stars)- Rollingstone.com

The humans are ultimately pretty disposable, but the monster and the camera are worth attention. (4/6 stars) - Timeout.com

Rubbish; epilepsy inducer; a probable cause of my epistaxis; watch it to have nausea, headache and vomiting (Blackhole rating)- KrisJasper.com

_________________________________

Anyway, I tried this in Illinois (hello anne and ardi!!!), and Im looking for one now...

SHISHA.

A shisha (or Hookah) is a glass-based water pipe for smoking, First invented in India, it is now commonly used in Arab states. It is reportedly less harmful than smoking cigars (aint sure about that to be honest, but..)

It is also called Nargila in Iraq, Bulgaria, Greece, Turkey, etc.. (nosebleed..)

I just call it "poh-king". That's Posh Smoking.






I was about to give my VISA card details to an online shop to purchase that cute, shiny, little thing (30cm in ht) on top... It's on sale at the mo, £26 (inc. postage), a bit small but that already includes everything (bowl, hose, pipe and tongs, plus coals and 2 bags 0f Al Fakher: apple and mint).

Before I clicked "checkout", I changed my mind... I MIGHT go to London before _____ 2008; I might find myself a good deal. If not, I'll look around here in Birmingham.. There are a lot of turban wearing people in here.. Maybe they sell it here. I'll just walk around wearing turban after eating kebabs, they might offer me a bargain; If I carry an explosive with me, they might give it to me for free.. who knows? oh well....

Lastly, I have been drinking Moroccan Mint Green Tea for almost a week now, I like it and it's actually good. Am I turning Arabic? hmmm....

Al salaam a'alaykum

Scary as well coz we might have an inspection in the Nursing Home soon... I texted my manager that I feel like Im developing Chicken pox and I need to be off for the next 3 weeks. I dont think she believed me for a sec.

إلى اللقاء

CHARITY

It's Friday. And I woke up early to be in the gym (not really, A went to work and A woke me up). So I went to the gym and I did my back, my abs and my arms. I usually spend 30 minutes trying to kill myself with the crosstrainer, but as my arms and back are still sore coz I was also there yesterday afternoon (and my anatomy is not used to the gym yet as I've been off it for nearly 5 weeks), I just stayed there and tried to kill myself for just about an hour today.



The gym is getting boring nowadays. No longer exciting as before (remember when I used to nose about the conversations of others?, or when I saw people getting fotos of themselves right at the middle of everything). Now, all I see are old hairy gorillas. F*cking Boring.



Anyway, this week we've watched the DVDs of Feast of Love, Buried Alive, and hopefully Cloverfield later. That film of Jackie Chan and Jet Li, and Mama Mia are shown in the cinemas this week. But aint really interested with those. I might just wait for their DVDs. As you've read in my last year's post... I prefer to watch Horror/Slasher movies, or anything Sci Fi, or anything with a lot of special FX in it... so not unless Meryl Streep is being chased by a slasher/killer and that's why she's singing Mama Mia then I might just watch that.



Also went to Bullring Mall yesterday,





I checked FCUK and got myself a bargain. I bought a a jacket for £38.00, slashed from £90. Not bad. Also as Im beginning to miss American foods, so I went to Selfridges to buy something american to bake.

One thing low about FCUK. There was this person who looked like a boy with a long hair (oh, he's a boy with a long hair), who's been helpful. He helped me looked for my style and size (he couldn't find the size Small 1/2 though, so I settled with medium). But when I paid for that item, I couldn't help but noticed that he has crooked and misalign teeth. If FCUK hired someone obviously imperfect, then I still have a chance! Although look at Abercrombie's models here.

I had a mail from one charity yesterday. I dont mind charities, they're actually good. They have a good cause and they usually help the needy. But this charity has an accompanying letter that stated they want me to give them £25.00 before Sept __, 2008. WHAT???!!!Charity is benevolent giving. I didn't know you could force others to do it and give them timetable for it.

This year has been very expensive for me. With the amount I paid for my UK Residency, US trip, NCLEX, I also had just paid $180 for my TOEFL exam, plus the condominium we pay monthly in Manila (I'm glad we took that condo though... the prices of houses in UK are plunging down, so that Condo is a good investment coz in Manila all prices are going up)... I might just sell my other kidney to sustain this. lol. Perhaps any of you who has an inheritance to spare and want to share it with me? Please forward it to me NOW; or add me in your last wills.

I am my own charity.

Recollect

It's just an average day.

This'll be one of those days when you wake up and you tell yourself it is average, but you want to make it perfect.

First, Im having a typical British SUMMER. Yes, it's raining outside. The weather in this country is really ridiculous. But I wont let that depress me. I'm going to the gym in a bit and I'm just waiting for this ravishing sky to calm down.

I haven't had a serious entry for awhile now, and I blame my environment for that. How can I make a serious entry if no one's serious around me? So I started watching telly, and it's FOXnews for me. And there, I found one serious issue...

POLICE SNIFFER DOGS TO WEAR BOOTEES DURING HOUSE SEARCHES TO AVOID OFFENDING MUSLIMS IN BRITAIN.

Hmmm... too serious, and too sensitive (even though the Americans were laughing at that issue). I dont want to make comments due to that word on top. It starts with an M and ends with another M (well with S actually coz it's plural). They'll do that as it was reported that some minorities (??? are they?) are offended by dogs...

But ok, I can't help it, I just have to say something...

The police are just doing their job, and for our security regardless of what culture we practice, we just have to abide by it. I salute them for being too sensitive with other cultures and practices, but IN MY OWN culture I find it rude if someone enters my house and not take his/her footwear off. Now, will the British police take their shoes off if they have to enter my premise, ie. to search for any terrorist-like activities?

And apparently, it is the dog's SALIVA that the Islams consider as impure and not the dog itself. So I suggest to the British police to use DOG BIBS instead of bootees, I think it's more appropriate (goodness me).

That was just my personal opinion.

I guess this war against terrorism is getting too far. What's next? Sneezing Not Allowed?




________________________________

I have plans before the year ends, BUT I'LL KEEP IT LIKE THAT AT THE MOMENT.

In our life, if we have a stronger stance and we stick with it, everything else will fall into place.

I, at present, am blessed with a good career, supportive colleagues, loving family and a lot of good friends. Still, there are days when I wake up and I try to make that average day into something non-earthly, I am always in discontent. I want a major change before the year ends.

I grew up consciously thinking what I have received; but to act on what I have learnt... that is my responsibilty to myself and to this world.

I must trust myself.

And I must believe that my fate is in harmonic convergence with luck...
that will make me whole again.


What did I tell you?


I am Kris Jasper,
and my life isn't complicated enough.

Coming Around

Triple H.

I'm hooked with wrestling again. I was when I was still studying in LCC, then kind of lost interest... but I have been watching it in Sky Premium since I came back from Chicago. Well, what'd you expect....

3 weeks in Chicago and with Patrick, and Patrick's wrestling mad (hello Patrick!). 3 weeks and what we have been watching in the telly were wrestling matches. Every hour we were playing his wrestling collections. I feel bad coz I promised him I'll feature his WWE wrestler -figures collection (the last time I counted I'm sure he had more than a dozen), and I should've uploaded it in youtube (a video of his figurines fighting/killing each other) and I haven't. I also forgot to take photos of them. Sorry Patrick.

Edge.

Well anyway, WWE is coming here on November and they'll be in 5 English cities. They'll be in Birmingham NEC on the 11th of Nov, and Batista's playing. I will definitely watch it with 2 friends, some said it's scripted.... Wrestling is scripted? I dont think so. Santa Claus maybe, or the tooth fairy... but wrestling? NAH!

Batista.

I have just watched WWE's Night of Champions last Saturday and Batista should have won that Heavyweight belt against Edge.. but oh well.. Also John Cena failed to steal the WWE Champion belt off Triple H. But it was a good show. Cant wait to see them on November.

John Cena.

I have encouraged one of my service users to like wrestling. She asked "what's that" and I explained that it's a sport where fighters try to win the competition by banging their opponent on the floor, by hitting them with anything hard, kicking and hitting each other, but like a fairy tale YOU WONT SEE ANY BLOOD. She seemed not interested but the story changed when I told her that most of these fighters wear nothing but spandex. And boy, she then didn't stop asking when the match'll be.

Watching wrestling wont be complete if you dont wear a proper attire. So I ordered on-line a Batista dog tag, a 2008 WWE Superstar Alumni book (for them to sign), a black Batista "the ANIMAL" shirt (it's on Nov, and it's autumn time so aint sure yet whether I'll wear denim hiphop shorts like John Cena or just plain jeans coz it'd be ridiculously cold). Well, it's my new image... Coz I change my image everytime. Coz I think my life isn't complicated enough.

Enough of that before I exacerbate more things.

Also, I've read today that the English language is nearing its millionth word. Congrats to whoever invented it. They said an average person can learn 7,000 words and a genius has 15,000 english words in his vocabulary. Well I'm a Van Dyke ( for my new readers, please read here), so with my neologism I am aware of 15,001 words. That's ONE word more than a genius!

Lastly, I decided to get myself back to the gym and Im slowly inching to my old mundane English life.

Im currently listening to the Soundtrack of HOOT.

1. Wondering Where the Lions Are - Jimmy Buffett
2. Back of the Bus - G. Love & Special Sauce
3. Barefootin' - Jimmy Buffett, Alan Jackson
4. Florida - Mofro
'5. Werewolves of London - Jimmy Buffett
6. Let Your Spirit Fly
7. Floridays - Jimmy Buffett
8. Coming Around - Brie Larson
9. Funky Kingston - Toots & the Maytals
10. Good Guys Win - Jimmy Buffett
11. Lovely Day - Bill Withers, Maroon 5, Bill Withers, Kori Withers

4th of JULY

What an engot! Why didn't I realize that when I purchased my ticket and booked my holiday (to be in the US this week)? Why last month and not last week? Argh!!!!!!!

I couldn't sleep last night, so I started moaning and I reviewed my holidays' videos in my phone supposedly to ease out my feelings; then I couldn't resist it, I felt this sad thing unexpectedly (yes, I do have feelings) where I felt my heart being crushed and I thought I was dying. My emotions are sad, panic, sad, chaos, sad, upset, sad, bland, sad, yearning for world peace, sad. I really dont want to swallow any Diazepam last night coz I know I could just sleep it over. And so I thought...

So at 1205am I phoned Anne's phone and guess what she told me? It's a nice week to be in the US due to the Indepence Day and Taste of Chicago celebrations.

Right! Fancy telling me that...

Anyway, I am amused by this PETA vs STONE issue recently. PETA made an offer to pay for a brain scan to determine if comments and actions that seem to demonstrate a lack of empathy are the result of a physical defect in the prefrontal area of Sharon's brain. All this pallovas had started when Sharon Stone made comments about China (Olympics, Earthquale, karma, etc).
I thought if only PETA will read all my previous posts, they might offer me not just a brain scan, but psychiatric and psychology assessments as well. Those who know me can attest that I'm normal really (?????????). That I don't bite and I'm really just average. If I come across to you like a suicidal retard, it's not me.. I have been misjudged.

HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!!!!

Anyway, it's Friday night... Cant wait for 9pm. Somebody planned something nice.

KNOWLEDGE POWER

I have been receiving funny messages in my email acct. My main e-mails before had been with AOL & YAHOO ( I think I had Earthling.net and Eudora as well). But since I have purchased this domain, I have been using krisjasper@krisjasper.com as my main email account (I guess my pathetic life isn't complicated enough...).

In that account I have received all sorts of messages from you, my dear readers (thank you very much and may I remind you that I have a paypal account as well), work associates and friends. I have received offers from some company to post about certain products and they'll pay me apparently, but I didn't consider their offers. I thought this is my PERSONAL site, and I'll only post/discuss things that have been part of my miserable life.

BUT WHAT'S MY EMAIL GOT TO DO WITH TODAY'S POST?

Here...

Sometimes I receive messages from anyone asking me how my day went, how cold it is in wherever country I was, how's work, or just forwarded messages. But the other day I received a msg from a stranger, H.J. J. (s****ss1**1@naver.com) from Seoul, Korea (as he/she had claimed), and he/she had emailed me this:

Hello!

Can I ask something!

ah.!! I'm sorry T_T;;

introduce myself!

My name is (fast forward............)



What does this sentence mean..?

"pre musta na nandyan ka ba?"

("pre musta na nandyan kpa(?) ba?")

It drives me crazy... what does it mean

please help me!!!


I had already emailed him/her back.. and I hope what I replied was correct. Bless... somebody's "driving crazy" with PRE MUSTA NA NANDYAN KA PA BA?

I was fascinated by that because:

1. I can only guess that he/she had taken my email add from this site.


2. My site is read all over


3. Somebody thought I have a brain and tried asking me something!!!

Anyway, H.J.J., I hope you got my reply and thank you for reading my posts. And dont hesitate to ask me another question.
Because "PAG WALANG KNOWLEDGE, WALANG POWER!" (and dont hesitate to ask me about that one as well).

Also, 12 more weeks and I'm on my 12-month of blogging. Nearly 12000 hits and read in 30 zones everyday... Thank you guys.






And here's from the office of my boss:


RULES OF THE OFFICE

1. A clean desk is the sign of a sick mind.


2. Tomorrow we are going to get organised.


3. Quick, look busy. Here comes the boss.


4. The boss is always right: Misinformed, lazy, stupid, but right.


5. Nothing is impossible: our boss says so.


6. To err is human but to foul things up completely requires a computer.


7. No-one is fired here. Slaves are only sold.


8. Work fascinates us. We can look at it for hours.


9. The boss treats us like mushrooms: Keeps us in the dark and feeds us bullshit.


10. We are the willing, led by the unknowing, doing the impossible, for the ungrateful.

and another one:

NOTICE

The management regret that it has come to their attention that Employees dying on the job are not falling down.

This practice must stop as it becomes impossible to distinguish between DEATH and NATURAL MOVEMENT of the staff.

Any employee found dead in an upright position will be dropped from the payroll.

As her Deputy, I'm learning a lot from her.

I'm hoping for some hits from:

Guam

Guam

Guam

Guam